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Gort

"Gentlemen, it is better to have died a small boy than to fumble the football" - John Heisman   "I make my practices real hard because if a player is a quitter, I want him to quit in practice, not in a game." – Bear Bryant / Alabama   "It isn't necessary to see a good tackle, you can hear it!” - Knute Rockne / Notre Dame   "At Georgia Southern, we don't cheat. That costs money, and we don't have any." – Erik Russell / Georgia Southern   "The man who complains about the way the ball bounces is likely to be the one who dropped it." - Lou Holtz / Arkansas - Notre Dame   "When you win, nothing hurts." -  Joe Namath / Alabama   "A school without football is in danger of deteriorating into a medieval study hall." -  Frank Leahy / Notre Dame   "There's nothing that cleanses your soul like getting the hell kicked out of you." -  Woody Hayes / Ohio State   "I don't expect to win enough games to be put on NCAA probation.  I just want to win enough to warrant an investigation." -  Bob Devaney / Nebraska   "In Alabama, an atheist is someone who doesn't believe in Bear Bryant." -  Wally Butts / Georgia   "I never graduated from Iowa.  But I was only there for two terms - Truman's and Eisenhower's." –  Alex Karras / Iowa   "My advice to defensive players is to take the shortest route to the ball, and arrive in a bad humor.” -  Bowden Wyatt / Tennessee   "I could have been a Rhodes Scholar except for my grades." - Duffy Daugherty / Michigan State   "Always remember Goliath was a 40 point favorite over David." -  Shug Jordan / Auburn   "I asked Darrell Royal, the coach of the Texas Longhorns, why he didn't recruit me." He said, "Well, Walt, we took a look at you, and you weren't any good." -  Walt Garrison / Oklahoma State   "Son, you've got a good engine, but your hands aren't on the steering wheel." -  Bobby Bowden / Florida State   "Football is NOT a contact sport, it is a collision sport.   Dancing IS a contact sport." -  Duffy Daugherty / Michigan State   After USC lost 51-0 to Notre Dame, his post-game message to his team was, "All those who need showers, take them." -  John McKay / USC   "If lessons are learned in defeat, our team is getting a great education.” -  Murray Warmath / Minnesota   "The only qualifications for a lineman are to be big and dumb.  To be a back, you only have to be dumb." -  Knute Rockne / Notre Dame   "We live one day at a time and scratch where it itches." -  Darrell Royal / Texas   "We didn't tackle well today, but we made up for it by not blocking." -  John McKay / USC   "I've found that prayers work best when you have big players." -  Knute Rockne / Notre Dame   Ohio State's Urban Meyer on one of his players:  "He doesn't know the meaning of the word fear. In fact, I just saw his grades and he doesn't know the meaning of a lot of words.”   Q:  Why do Tennessee fans wear orange? A:  So they can dress that way for the game on Saturday, go hunting on Sunday, and pick up trash on Monday.   Q:  What does the average Alabama player get on his SATs?  A:  Drool.   Q:  How many Michigan State freshmen football players does it take to change a light bulb? A:  None. That's a sophomore course.   Q:  How did the Auburn football player die from drinking milk? A:  The cow fell on him.   Two Texas A&M football players were walking in the woods. One of them said, "Look, a dead bird." The other looked up in the sky and said, "Where?"